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Home » Christian Books  »  Grief  »  Death Is No Stranger
Death Is No Stranger
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Death Is No Stranger
Helping Children Grieve
By: Cynthia Long Lasher
CSS Publishing

CSS Price: $9.95
e-book Price: $8.46

CSS Item #: 0788025058
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Description

The death of a loved one is a traumatic, life-altering experience at any time in our lives. However, it can be especially harrowing when the one left behind is a child. These children must face the difficult reality of mortality without the coping mechanisms we gain as we mature. Therefore, it is up to us as adults to aid and guide these little ones through this experience, loving and supporting them along the way. But how do we begin?

Death Is No Stranger, Cynthia Long Lasher offers resources and guidance for aiding in grief ministry to children, allowing them to adapt in a healthy manner to the reality of life without a loved one while still allowing them to remain what they are -- children. This is an invaluable resource for parents, teachers, ministers, and others who interact with children during times of loss.

This resource will guide the reader through the process of aiding children in their grief, covering such topics as:

  • Talking To Children About Death
  • How Children Understand Death
  • Defining Grief and Mourning, and
  • Types of Grief Reactions

God calls us to protect and care for our children. Death Is No Stranger gives direction on how to care for children in these difficult circumstances. Most importantly, this book helps us during times of loss to guide children to God, who loves them most of all.

Cynthia Long Lasher is the Grief Support Specialist and Program Coordinator for Shenandoah Valley Grief Services, part of Lutheran Family Services of Virginia. She is also the copastor for Grief Ministry at Christ Lutheran Church in Staunton, Virginia. She has served in pastoral positions in other Lutheran churches in Virginia and Pennsylvania. She received her Master of Divinity (M.Div.) degree at Lutheran Theological Seminary in Columbia, South Carolina, and her Doctor of Ministry (D.Min.) degree from Lutheran Theological Seminary at Philadelphia. She and her husband, John, live in Waynesboro, Virginia.


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  Customer Reviews:
Average Rating: 5 Star(s) (5 out of 5 stars)

3 of 3 Reviews Showing:

 Star(s) Reviewed by Judith Schrauder Virginia, July, 01 2008
As a Grief Support Specialist and minister, Cynthia Long Lasher has walked with many people on their grief journeys. In her new book, Death is no Stranger, she shares practical advice, Christian perspective, and general information on helping children who are facing or have faced the death of a loved one. She also shows readers how to find teachable moments throughout childhood to help children learn to cope with and understand death. Long Lasher’s book will be a wonderful guide for anyone walking with a young person through the grief process.

Judith Schrauder

Parenting Program Coordinator

Central Shenandoah Valley Office on Youth

540-942-6757



 Star(s) Reviewed by David P. von Schlichten, Lutheran Partners USA, May, 13 2008
The middle of the night can fall upon us anytime, but God is with us all the time. Many fine new books can help Christians to see the risen Son even when darkness coils around us.

Darkness is palpable when children must cope with death, and adults may feel fear and confusion about how to help children through such a painful time. One useful resource for these ordeals is Death Is No Stranger: Helping Children Grieve by Cynthia Long Lasher (CSS Publishing, 2008, $9.95). Lasher draws from her experience in grief ministry to provide wise guidance for helping pastors and lay people support bereaved children. Over the course of eight short but full chapters, Lasher instructs readers on topics such as: factors that affect how children might respond to death, how children understand death, the variety of reactions to grief, and how our beliefs affect our grief.

Lasher’s book is full of good sense and smart reminders. For instance, she reminds adults not to use with children euphemisms regarding death (such as “pass away”) or to offer trite consolations such as “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.” Instead, we are to be gentle but direct and concrete, remembering that children are literal thinkers. If we tell a child that a dead person is simply sleeping or away on a trip, the child then may fear sleep or loved ones going on trips. It is more effective to use clear, honest language (pp. 15–17).

Another example of Lasher’s helpfulness is in her descriptions of ways that children respond to a loved one’s death. Sometimes a child reacts to such news by playing with toys. This reaction does not indicate indifference or a lack of understanding. Rather, Lasher explains, a child may turn to play to help herself or himself manage the grief (p. 63).

In numerous ways, this short book provides valuable direction for the person trying to help a child through the dark night of grief.



 Star(s) Reviewed by Robert Holley Summerville, SC, March, 04 2008
What a wonderful gift Cynthia Long Lasher has given us in “Death is No Stranger – Helping Children Grieve.” She does three very important things for us who help any child as they grieve: She has written a very accessible book, providing accurate information that is very helpful and clearly connects all this to our faith in God. This book is a gem.

Have you been faced with caring for a grieving child? You will appreciate how helpful and accessible this book is. Some things are obvious, but hearing them again from Pastor Long Lasher is so helpful. Is it helpful to try and ‘protect’ a child from death? Not really; they will figure it out anyway. Is there some magical formula? No. We all grieve differently and children are no exception. These and many other insights assist you in listening to and journeying with a child who grieves.

Repeatedly Pastor Long Lasher provides the best and latest information on grief work and how children do it. There is great variety. Yet, there are things you need to know, like the appropriate developmental stages of children. Each child is individual, but will most likely exhibit some of the characteristics of the five groups she discusses. This, again, is an example of the helpfulness of this book. Accurate information helps you and the child. It is in these pages.

As people of faith we can be “ministers of presence.” Children need significant and loving adults in their lives as they grieve. Pastor Long Lasher places us in the community of faith and reminds us of the promise and power of God’s love for us in the cross. While our Christian hope does not remove the sadness or loneliness, it is key to bringing comfort and hope. This is a faithful book when so many books on grief are not.

My suggestion to you is buy it, read it, and give it to anyone you know who can benefit by having it as they respectfully and lovingly walk with a child who grieves.

• Pastor Robert F. Holley, Summerville, South Carolina




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